With blond hair and blue eyes, Mark* seemed angelic. In reality, he was sad, angry, and lonely. Mark had experienced numerous horrors at home in his short life: violence, substance abuse and drug abuse. Most tragically, when he was only 7, both his mother and the man who lived with them died by suicide within two days of each other. He was orphaned – or so he thought.
Mark carried a great burden of trauma with him when he arrived at HomeSafe’s Sylvester Family Campus in January 2019, the day before his ninth birthday. He had been removed from his home in 2015, but neither a foster home nor the home of an aunt was a good fit. Fueled by rage, he was “acting out” physically and sexually, and was hospitalized multiple times under Florida’s Baker Act for threatening to kill himself or others. He was referred to our Libra Boys program because it would provide the intensive therapy services he needed to process his feelings, develop better coping skills, and start healing.
The first year was hard. Mark didn’t trust anyone; he put up a wall by calling the staff derogatory names and using profanity. He also channeled his anger inward — literally beating himself up. But Mark was surprised in various ways. One was that the staff weren’t put off by his misbehavior, but continued to love him because they were so determined to help him.
One breakthrough came after Mark moved from the house where he was assigned, supervised by Ms. Monique, to the other house on campus supervised by Mr. Derek. Ms. Monique’s house was being converted from a boys’ home to a girls’ home. Mark discovered he missed Ms. Monique and her team and would visit them daily. Eventually, those visits ended with hugs. Mark was letting himself begin to trust.
As Mark adjusted to Mr. Derek’s house, the staff there helped him build his self-esteem and comforted him whenever he could not soothe himself. Earlier this year, after Mark was switched to a new medication, he gradually gained more control and the ability to stop and think before acting out. A new therapist, Ms. Stephanie, became another adult Mark could trust because she spent time with him in “his world,” shooting hoops and riding skateboards.
It was Ms. Stephanie who gave Mark the biggest surprise of all. Several months ago, she learned from Mark’s treatment team that his records misidentified his biological father. Mark’s mother had told him the man who lived with them was his father. The truth was that his real father was still alive and reached out to Mark’s case manager, looking to connect with him. After a paternity test provided confirmation, Ms. Stephanie shared the happy news with Mark.
Now, Mark and his dad are working on becoming a family. They’ve met via Zoom, are participating in therapy sessions with Ms. Stephanie, and are eager to see each other in person. Mark is excited about the prospect of joining his father in Michigan by Christmas, and enjoying the unexpected gift of a safe, happy home.
The other children in our residential program are not yet ready to leave HomeSafe’s care, but it’s equally important that they experience the magic of the holidays and warmth of a loving home. After all, HomeSafe is their home.
* Name changed to protect the client.
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